what she wants you to see

This entry is a tribute to Billy Joel. This is his "Always a Woman," and I know its about a girl and I am a girl, but I'm totally feeling this song right now for whatever reason that is. Comments will follow that may or may not be relevant to the song.
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She can kill with a smile
She can wound with her eyes
She can ruin your faith with her casual lies
And she only reveals what she wants you to see
Yeah, she hides like a child
But she's always a woman to me

She can lead you to love
She can take you or leave you
She can ask for the truth
But she'll never believe you
And she'll take what you give her, as long as it's free
Yeah, she steals like a thief
But she's always a woman to me

(chorus:)
Oh-she takes care of herself
She can wait if she wants
She's ahead of her time
Oh-and she never gives out
And she never gives in
She just changes her mind

And she'll promise you more
Than the Garden of Eden
Then she'll carelessly cut you
And laugh while you're bleedin'
But she'll bring out the best
And the worst you can be
Blame it all on yourself
Cause she's always a woman to me

She is frequently kind
And she's suddenly cruel
She can do as she pleases
She's nobody's fool
But she can't be convicted
She's earned her degree
And the most she will do
Is throw shadows at you
But she's always a woman to me
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Okay now, you ask, "what is the relation?" Beats the heck out of me, she said. I'm just loving this right now, becuase the woman is so powerful yet so completely vulnerable. Something in that speaks to me, I think something in that speaks to mankind in general.

But the line "She only reveals what she wants you to see" is endlessly intriguing to me. Is that how we all are? I will admit it, as "straight-shooting" as I can be (or maybe as I want to be) sometimes, I know I'm guilty or giving off certain impressions of myself. When you sit back and think about it, it is funny how we pick and choose who knows what about our character, etc. Partially I think it is becuase we lack a full understanding of ourselves, but isn't that an issue that goes back to Eden (identity, what we put our identity in, what we do when we discover new things about ourselves, why we crave knowledge, why we despise not knowing the "whole truth," why are we seeking more when we could be satisfied with what we have been given.....maybe that is a weird interpretation, but it is one I cannot ignore). Interesting in court we are sworn to tell "the whole truth." Seems with our curiosity of the rest of the world we would be perfectly willing to tell the whole truth, since that is what we in turn expect. Tangent. Sorry, anyways....

It is so interesting how people react when they realize people are knowing things about them they had no idea people were knowing. We get scared. We run off, we pull away, or push others away. But why? I mean, what would be the purpose of pulling away once these things were already known? It doesn't make us any less vulnerable, it just gives a sense of control again in a world where we sometimes feel like we have none. But how do we pick and choose who to push away? And when the snowball gets rolling a little too fast down the hill we put on the brakes. But maybe we should just go with it. I don't know. Maybe I would feel less pressure if I just went with it. In moderation of course.

But again, it is funny, we are okay with a special insight into others' world, but not okay with them having special insight into ours. We are a bit selfish with ourselves. But all with good intentions. Self-preservation is a powerful thing. It is just funny how that works out. People will take serious measures to remove, alter, change or erase information. Odd, but we have all done it. Well, I know I have, and that is the only reason I feel okay making that statement But understandable in a certain way. Oddly enough, it is those we know that we feel we must remove, alter, change and erase information for. Shouldn't we be more concerned with those we don't know? Yet continually, we worry about those we do. Since we do know them, and if they are of any value to us, shouldn't it just be okay? Shouldn't they love us regardless, in spite of and because of it all? I hope I can do that And not just do that, but be able to show that. That is what I pray for. That and discernment. That and discernment and that those I know can love me regardless, in spite of and becuase of it all. Maybe that is a tall order, but it is worth a shot right?

I will end with the definition of surreal. For several reasons. I like that word a lot, maybe it is the spelling; I like the idea of it; I like the principle behind its use; I like the little bit of eeriness it evokes; I like it in its positive connotation. So here we go:
surreal: adj; having an oddly dreamlike quality.

With that I'm off to view The Royal Tenenbaums.